Fumble Through It

Last week I attended the visitation of a child and new member of my gym. While there are so many things to say about how tragic the situation is – I’ll say – just be kind and love one another. Really there is no greater task we need to achieve than this. But, the point of this post isn’t necessarily about kindness, but rather fumbling through life….

As my assistant coach, Julie, and 15-year-old fighter, Jayden, and I returned from the visitation and I pulled up to drop them off, I put the car in park and turned around and said to Jayden, “Hey, before you get out of the car, I need you to know…” and then I fumbled through some conversation about how much he means to me.

After they got out of the car and as I drove away, I beat myself up about how it sounded or what I should have said.

But as I drove, I realized that even though the conversation wasn’t perfect or even if I left things out and should have said things differently — I said it and regardless of all of those things, he heard it. 

Regardless if I fumbled through it…it still had value. 

And when I think about fumbling through things, I think oftentimes, that’s the best thing we can do.

When we wait for the perfect opportunity or the perfect words, we often miss the moments that actually matter.

When we wait for guaranteed perfection, we are most often left afraid to act at all.

I’ve decided that the best thing I can do is to fumble through my life…to stop waiting until I’m sure that perfection is attainable…but rather to just do the best I can…

To trust that at least if I’m fumbling through, then I am at least moving and not stagnant. 

It may not be pretty… in fact, it might even be messy… but I’m going to give myself permission to fumble through it… whatever it may be: relationships, friendships, diets, exercise, Muay Thai, difficult conversations, personal finances, business decisions, etc… LIFE.

It’s okay to fumble through it.